Ways to Give to Your Children

“Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.”  (Phil 4:9 KJVS)

I love this part of Scripture, because it explains how we pass information to others, in this post particularly to our children.

If they have learned, we must teach.  We teach by example, word and deed.

If they have received, we must give.  We give precepts, ideas, vision, focus, priorities, explanations, value.

If they have heard, we must speak.  We speak truth and love, with kindness and grace.

If they have seen things, I must demonstrate.  My life should be an epistle to be known and read by our children.  My life should testify to the truth of the Word applied.

Challenge:  Teach, give, speak and demonstrate always, so your children can learn, receive, hear and see things that they can follow after those things, and the peace of God will be with them! 

Morning by Morning

“[The Servant of God says] The Lord God has given Me the tongue of a disciple and of one who is taught, that I should know how to speak a word in season to him who is weary. He wakens Me morning by morning, He wakens My ear to hear as a disciple [as one who is taught].”  (Is 50:4 AMP)

One of the most successful investments of my time as I was raising my children (as it still is now) is getting into the Word of God each and every morning.  By dedicating that time to prayer and Bible study, the Lord has supernaturally directed me through His Word.  Because He knew what I would face day by day, each morning it would seem that my Bible study would prepare me for what was ahead either that very day or soon thereafter.

Challenge:  If you really want to be prepared for your day, make sure you make time to start it with a Bible study and prayer time!  The Lord will speak to you through His Word and you will be ready to face your challenges!

Because someone ELSE likes it!

Teach your children to "give and take" early.  YOU pick the game every other time.  Let them call a friend who is coming over or who they are visiting to find out their favorite food or thing to do. Teach them to be considerate of others' feelings, and what it means to "walk a mile in someone else's shoes."  Teach your children to take turns picking the music, the television show, just about everything they can consider someone else on.

Let your child pack up some of their things and bring them to a shelter.  Purchase a meal and give it to a homeless person on the street together.  Pack up some of their old toys and send them on a missions trip with someone.  My friend, Jessie, and her daughter, Kaylee, sponsor a child that is Kaylee's age, and regularly send her items, cards, and money for necessities.  

Challenge:  Teach your child that because someone ELSE likes it is often reason enough to choose it.  Teach your child to consider others' needs and feelings, and to learn the JOY of putting others' desires first. 

Ability to Handle Disabilities

One thing I found is that children are an excellent source of encouragement when people are down and out.  I delighted taking my children with me when I volunteered at senior residents homes and at the cancer group support center, as well as when I went to funeral homes and to visit the sick.   I taught my children from a young age to be comfortable around people who were different and hurting.  It IS scary for children to be around seniors in a home sometimes, because children need to learn that seniors often try to hold onto them, are very loud, sometimes say strange things, etc.   I taught my children how to ask them questions and how to talk to them.  A few awkward situations which resulted in learning experiences, and my children were off and running.

When someone had a handicap of some sort, whether an obvious burn, in a wheel chair, some sort of disfigurement, I taught my children to be comfortable talking to them about it and trying to relate to people with disabilities.  We read a story together about a little girl that had cerebral palsy, to teach them empathy for children and others with disabilities.  We often went out of our way to help someone or talk to someone who was obviously disabled.

A common thing I've heard from volunteering at the cancer group and from those with disabilities is that people avoid them or are not comfortable talking to them or looking at them.  I know that I have put a dent in that problem by teaching and training my children to be able to relate and talk to those with handicaps.

Challenge:  Teach your children why other people may look or act different, and if possible teach them how to relate to the handicapped.  Read them a story about someone who is handicapped.  If you have a chance, ask someone about their experience who is handicapped, showing true interest and asking questions that show how you honor them for all the extra effort they have to expend just to do normal activities.   

“Finally, all [of you] should be of one and the same mind (united in spirit), sympathizing [with one another], loving [each other] as brethren [of one household], compassionate and courteous (tenderhearted and humble).”  (1Pet 3:8 AMP)

Do It With ALL Your Might!

If something is worth doing it, it is worth doing with ALL your might!  I taught my children that if they were doing something:  Get INTO it or get OUT OF it!  

If they made a commitment to something, they had to follow through on the commitment, even if they "changed their mind."  

I also made sure that they saw that I walked the talk, and that they saw me doing things with all my might.  It's a great reminder to start teaching early!

Challenge:  Teach your children early to put their whole heart into what they are doing, and to get INTO it or get OUT OF it!

“Whatever your hand finds to do, do it with all your might,...”  (Eccl 9:10 AMP)

Love Means ALWAYS Having to Say You’re Sorry!

When my children had to apologize to one another or to my husband or me, we made sure they knew how to apologize correctly.  A quick sorry wouldn't cut it, because they could say sorry without really meaning it.

We found that if they said what they were sorry for, it helped them identify what they did wrong. Then they had to say two sentences or reasons why they were sorry, and then ask to be forgiven. 

Sounds like a rote formula, but I believe this really helped keep accountability and forgiveness alive.

To give you an idea of how it worked, it would be something like

I'm sorry that I called you 'stupid'.  That wasn't very nice of me.  I never want to hurt your feelings.  Would you please forgive me?

Challenge:  Teach your child to identify what they are sorry about and give a few reasons why they are sorry so they learn how their actions affect others.  Make sure they ask to be forgiven, so the records are all kept clean!

Plan Number Nine

When I was younger, being the oldest girl I was responsible for a lot of "extra" things to help around the house.  After everyone went to bed, sometimes "plan number nine" would go into place.  After a little while (if I didn't fall asleep), when everyone settled down, I was allowed to get up and stay up for a little while longer with my parents.

It was a special fun time, not easily acquired.  It was a reward for the responsibility I assumed.  It was a little "perk".

In my family I instituted the same "plan number nine" for my older children when they deserved a special perk.  It was so fun to see them looking around and quietly re-joining us for a special dvd or game!  

The other stagnant reward the older child got for the assumption of extra responsibilities was that they could ride in the front seat.  My rule was that the oldest person there gets to take front seat.  Rule still stands today, although it's not as regular a benefit as it once was!

Challenge:  Make a "plan number nine" or special privilege at your home for the children who assume extra responsibility.  They won't forget it, and it will encourage them to receive that extra "perk" for the extras they help out with!